Why does AFCCA happen?
We all have emotions which help us to express our thoughts and feelings and communicate these to people around us. Sometimes these emotions can cause harm if we don’t manage them well. “Emotional self-regulation” is present when a person is able to keep their emotional reactions “in check”. In other words, it’s our ability to handle our feelings and respond appropriately to the demands of a situation. This is something that most children and adults practice and learn to do well over time.
Have you ever found that if you’re around someone who’s really stressed, you also start to feel stressed? This is because our stress can cause others to become stressed and vice versa. The good news is that our calm can help others to become calm as well. This process is called co-regulation, and it happens when adults and children or youth help each other to manage their emotions together. When co-regulation is successful, a parent or caregiver who presents empathy and peacefulness can help the child or youth to decrease stress they may be experiencing and increase calm.
AFCCA happens when there’s a breakdown in the process of co-regulation between a child or youth and the adults around them. Aggression can occur when the child or young person struggles to manage their emotions and they direct their frustration to parents or caregivers, siblings in the home or other adults in a caregiver role. Over time, this behaviour can evolve into a habit and become more intense. There are several things that can make this worse or more extreme for a child or youth, like challenges or gaps in communication skills, day-to-day stressors or life experiences. Whatever the cause, however, the struggle to co-regulate with adults can result in progressive challenges with self-regulation for the child or youth exhibiting AFCCA. This dynamic can deepen the issues faced in the family over time, making them harder to deal with.